Countdown to London

I am a little overwhelmed as I sit here at the kitchen table contemplating the arduous task of packing well for my first international trip. In eleven days, I will be flying to London, England for a week-long stay as a trip coordinator for my college. The empty suitcase glares at me, taunting me with the fact that there is no way to truly, completely, and perfectly pack the right things.

Simply put, I'm nervous. I'm a nervous flyer; I hate the takeoff and I hate the landing, but I absolutely love the middle of the flight. Weak-stomached, I am easily nauseated and my level of anxiety is much higher than the average person's. Add in the fact that I'm extremely obsessive-compulsive, and it's easy to see why packing for a trip of this magnitude is stressful for me. The fact that I am semi-responsible for the students (granted they are all adults capable of decision-making) in a foriegn land is daunting. The only thing I know about London is that Chaucer and Shakespeare are both buried there, and I am absolutely thrilled to be going.

In truth, I know a lot about London - but only about London hundreds of years ago through reading poetry. As an English teacher specializing in British Literature, this is my pilgrimage to what is basically the equivalent of Mecca for avid readers and nerds. I'm not sure why some of the other trip participants are going. Certainly, London is a world-class city and there's lots of fun things to do there, but I feel something internal pulling me there, as if it's a place I have always been destined to go. Rather, it's a place I must go - I need to feel and see that the literature I have dedicated my life to teaching is tangible and therefore real. I must walk in Shakespeare's steps in Stratford and breathe in the air of inspiration and creativity. For me, this trip will be life-changing and even more life-affirming.

As I look at my empty suitcase and contemplate the things I will be taking with me, I am more excited about what I will be bringing home. Not souveneirs or photographs, but memories and emotions. I plan to do a lot of writing there, as well, because I want to preserve how I feel about everything. My friend Rhonda always tells me that when people go on trips, they gain perspective. It's true - everytime I have taken an extended trip (the fathest away from my 'home' in the southern states that I've ever been is Leamington, Ontario and San Antonio, Texas), I have come home full of ideas and inspiration. My soul is rejuvenated by the new experiences and my mind is clear of old clutter.

What I'm even more worried about, however, is what I will be leaving behind. This will be the longest I've ever been away from my daughter, and that pains me. I will miss her so much. She's only almost 2, so I doubt she'll miss me terribly! Part of me feels guilty for being away from her for so long, and to be honest, I was very torn about taking this trip in the first place. But it is a once in a lifetime opportunity, and I'd be foolish not to take it. London is calling - and I am answering!

Countdown to London: http://www.bored.com/makecountdowns/show.php?id=158004